We All Need Some Humor

[BeatleBob]

We All Need Some Humor
Post some funnies here  :-)

I'll start off with some....

[60s Fan]

LOL!!!!!! Hilarious! Especially the monkey birth certificate and Muppets one! LMAO!!!!!

[Candy O]

LOL! Born in Bronx Zoo! Funny 'cuz he studied in da Bronx, although he was born in Queens, NYC!

[Candy O]

Dead Husband Walking

Here's what NOT to say or do as a husband...or boyfriend.

Posted by Eh Bee on Tuesday, August 18, 2015

[BeatleBob]

Sadie, So Glad you got a kick out of those!!!! :-) I Cracked Up over the two you mentioned, as well!! LMAO!!!! :-)

Candy O, LMAO!!! Born in Bronx Zoo!! :-) WOW! I didn't know that he studied in Da Bronx! I knew he was born in Queens! Thanks for the Info! :-)

Candy O, The Video you posted Didn't show up for me? It Says " Video Unavailable,
This video may no longer exist, or you don't have permission to view it."

:-(  Thanks for posting it anyway! I imagine it was a Funny one about Trump?  ;-)

[BeatleBob]

I found this Funny! LOL!! ;-)


The Importance of Walking:

 
Walking can add minutes to your life.

This enables you at 95 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month..
                 
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.
 
I like long walks, especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.
The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
 
  I have to walk early in the morning,
  before my brain figures out what I'm doing..
 
I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there.
Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
 
 
 The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'
If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
start with a small country.

 
I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years,......
just getting over the hill.
 
 
We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
 
AND
 
Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

[BeatleBob]

Thought this was cute, LOL!

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession. 

 

One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment.  He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects:  

 

1. A Bible

 

2. A silver dollar 

 

3.​A bottle of whiskey 

 

4. A Playboy magazine 

 

"I'll just hide behind the door," the old preacher said to himself.  "When he comes home from school today, I'll see which object he picks up." 

 

"If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be!

 

"If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a business man and that would be okay, too. 

 

"But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunken bum, and Lord, what a shame that would be. 

 

"And worst of all if he picks up that magazine he's going to be a skirt-chasing womanizer." 

 

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room. The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.

 

Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink, while he admired the magazine's centerfold.

 

"Lord have mercy," the old preacher whispered. "He's gonna run for Congress."

;-)

[60s Fan]

Lmao I've heard that joke before, but instead of Congress at the ending, it said ex-President Bill Clinton. LOL!!!!! 

[BeatleBob]

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!! Really? It said ex-President Bill Clinton at the end? That's even Better!!! LMAO!!! ;-)

[BeatleBob]

[60s Fan]

LOL!!! I hate to ever laugh at plane crash jokes but that last comic is just too funny!

That little girl making the same exact face expression as that dog and that cat looking at the "Felix" food is cute and funny too!  But nothing beats that Donald Trump pamphlet. Hilarious and clever! It looks so real too! Lmao!!!!

Thanks for the laugh, Beatlebob! I really needed it today! :-D 

[BeatleBob]

LOL!!!! ;-) Yeah, I usually wouldn't laugh at plane crash jokes either!! But, it was Funny!! ;-)

I thought you would get a kick out of the one with the cat and the one with the dog!!! Cute!!! :-) And I knew you would find the one about Trump Hilarious like I did!! LMAO!!!! That Trump pamphlet SHOULD be in ALL Doctor's Offices!!! LOL!!! ;-) Yes, Hilarious and clever!!! And it Does look so Real!!! LOL!!!!!!

You're Welcome for the Laugh, Sadie!!!  :-) Since you needed a good laugh, I'm Glad I posted them!!! :-)

I might not be online tomorrow? I'm not sure yet? Either way, will catch up soon!!!
Have a FAB Day My Friend!!! :-)

[BeatleBob]

And the 2015 version of young Sally Field.   ;-)